Marriage advice for the young military spouse

I’ve been married to the military for 20 years & I’ve seen the best and worst that military life has to offer. I have a BIG heart for military marriage; so for what it’s worth, here is my marriage advice for the young military spouse.

This is my attempt to rewrite history, through you, through my little nook on the internet. Take it from me, some mistakes are not worth repeating.

Being a military spouse is no doubt uniquely difficult. Little did I know that when he enlisted, I too enlisted into the military, in a sense. The old saying “the hardest job in the Marine Corps is being a Marine’s wife” is a saying for good reason.

For the young military spouse

Dear younger me, I know how depressing it feels to know that your boyfriend is leaving for boot camp! Soon, he will propose and you’ll be leaving the nest, unprepared for the reality of military life.

Congratulations! You’re a newly wed & eager to start your next chapter of life in the military! You don’t realize it now, but traveling, keeps you apart from your family and friends back home. You’re going to miss a lot of special occasions with them.

But don’t miss out on the beautiful opportunity in front of you to share the holidays with your new friends, who you will one day, call your family too.

You are going to be home alone, quite often. Don’t resent your husband for that, you made this choice too. Trust me, he wants to be home with you, but they call it “military orders” for a good reason, they’re not options.

Yes, you did get married young and I know you’re reconsidering your decision, but remember your vows!

Always remember to focus on what you can control and take advantage of making good memories, no matter your situation.

You’re stronger than you think and one day you will look back and you won’t remember the hard times, you’ll relish in all the great times!

Don’t convince yourself that you deserve better than this. I promise you, the grass isn’t greener on the other side, different, but not greener. Life outside of the military has it’s own difficulties too.

The challenging times you fight to get through today will make your marriage stronger later because you chose not to walk away and to endure the tough times together.

If you think this lifestyle is only hard on you, you’re wrong, it’s hard on him too, so love, support & encourage one another. Last but certainly not least, give thanks & in everything, seek the Lord’s direction.

Marriage advice & tips

Tip #1: When you’re feeling lonely, don’t risk a clear conscious by doing something you’ll regret. Honor the man you chose to spend your life with and write a beautiful, blameless story. To be perfectly clear, REMAIN FAITHFUL, it’s not worth it.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones. Proverbs 12:4

Tip #2: Have a mentor or 2 or 3 🙂 Find a senior military spouse that can share her wisdom and encouragement with you on the same challenges you’re facing. You’re not alone! Surround yourself with like-minded women who will raise you up and not set you back.

Be careful who you ask advice from and who you talk to about your marriage woes. Every action has a result and talking to the wrong person about your husband can quickly turn them against him.

It’s easy for us to get caught up in our emotions. One minute we are justifying our emotions and your friends and family will too. It will be easier for you to forgive your spouse than it will be for your friends and family. Before you know it, you’ve turned everyone against him.

Tip #3: You are more than just a military spouse! Wear the title with pride & seek opportunities available to you! But don’t lose yourself in the process. Continue to chase your dreams. And If you dream of having a family and being a SAHM, then live your calling as a stay-at-home mom! Your husband will admire you for it!

Tip #4: Don’t distance yourself, rather create a community for yourself. Get involved with his command group. Seek out other spouses in your neighborhood who need you as much as you need them. Join groups such as PWOC or military spouses club.

Tip #5: Remember this tip first 🙂 Live at the feet of Jesus! Surrender yourself & your marriage to Him and He will make your path straight sister. Pray always. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

I hope you enjoyed marriage advice for the young military spouse. Did you find any of these marriage advice tips helpful?

Please take a moment to leave a comment, I love hearing from you!

(This is not sponsored content and the views and opinions expressed are my own.)